Strikes

So I encountered my first 'strike' of the trip and naturally assumed this was some kind of actual strike. Informed that it affected both private and state buses on the route I wanted to take I was a bit confused. It eventually turns out that the strike is in fact civil disobedience and involves the residents of a province blocking the government built interstate roads... probably sitting down as is usual for an Indian protest.... no idea who started all of that or what they were protesting against ;)

Civilisation

So Andhra is quite a poor state, and looking back I've probably been far too negative. Ever since I entered Karnataka it looks more like somewhere in southern Europe. Passed a Dominos, KFC... The motorcyclists almost all wear helmets, but not their passengers of course. The roads are cleaner..  and the police have hilarious hats.... I miss rural India already

New rules

You have to enjoy the chaos. I visited a waterfall which unfortunately turned out to be rather busy as it is also a temple on the pilgrim route. There were three separated channels entering the temple doorway, the barriers here didn't seem to correspond to any visible system and its more like a maze. Unfortunately I soon became trapped in one of the queues, between two crowds of people trying to move in opposite directions. Indians don't queue, and if you aren't pushing the person in front hard enough the one behind will give you a nudge or gesture at the lack of space you are supposed to move into. Anyone who says jostle is a liar, this is pushing, as the crowd surges backwards and forwards a few people slip on the steps. Its alright though, the crowd is thick enough to prevent anyone falling. A police officer stands in the middle of this blowing a whistle in what is becoming a familiar style - he doesn't actually give any directions, just repeated bursts on the whistle. I'm not sure it even has any meaning, just blast blast blast. The bus drivers have much the same idea with the horn, it doesn't seem to mean "I'm here" or "get out of the way" as it does when a vehicle is being cut up, its just relentless. Some even have a rhythm to their horn blasting, a true one note song. While being squashed in this slightly damp crowd (holy bathing at the waterfall) I noticed that people would smile back. You have to enjoy the chaos.
A similar rule is followed on buses, of all the Britishisms to rub off, women and children first wasn't one of them. In case anyone thinks I'm passing a judgement (again) I'm not though, I have seen just how many people in England don't grasp the simple concept that people get off the train first.

Hidden Views

I am essentially following a pilgrim route, so a number of the temple priests assume I am a Hare Krishna. One time I did correct this and admitted I didn't have any god, and there was silence, as if they can see right inside me and read my judgement. It's as if I have suddenly admitted out loud that I think they all look a bit primitive and are about as close to dancing around a fire chanting as you can get. Or that I have passed judgement on all religion, which is closer to the truth. This may be true but I don't want to say it, I do try and show respect. They are wrong though, and the great pasta knows of this.

Holy Hill

"Tirumala hills must be very sacred ground"
"How can you tell that?"
"It hasn't got shit all over it"

I remember the Monty Python team commented about their motivation for this scene, that preceding historical dramas had failed to capture the grim reality of medieval life. Just as all those wonderful pictures you see of India fail to capture the sheer quantity of rubbish which covers the ground, or the stench of urine or open drains. At least here signs inform guests not to spit, urinate in the open or litter, its a vision of progress, maybe within reach. There is even a ban on soft drinks in plastic bottles and carrier bags, which in classic Indian style doesn't yet extend to: Mineral water, or any of the single serving prepackaged foods or cosmetics, religious tat or toys

Poor monkey

A man is begging, and to set the scene I'm probably a bit hot and tired, so on top idiot abroad form. This is also the biggest pilgrim destination in India, and about as close as you can get to the prime begging location. He has a monkey on a chain, attracting people for photos, but in his hand he has also a stick and prods it once. I look around for a stick with which to beat him, feeling a sudden rage. But I can't see one,  and I admit this was possibly for the best. Instead I spend the next few minutes harassing him and making rude hand gestures. I realise that I am taking his business and willingly pose for half a dozen photos. For some reason people here want to remember my pretty face :D. Eventually I accept that while this is a strictly vegetarian sacred place, the people here don't grasp animal welfare

Indian English

Some of the english here has evolved separately and so preserves older forms, but unfortunately for a pedant other times words end up misused. For example 'hotel' almost always means 'restaurant'... or occasionally actually  'hotel' just to throw you. I don't usually mind, you have to try and guess the real meaning of any statement... but the other day I finally felt compelled to launch into a description of why, although beer and whiskey can be purchased from a wine shop, they are not wine (at least in modern english). In the end I settled on a diagram classifying alcohol, and covering various types including cider, beer, ale, lager, spirits, vodka, whiskey, gin, and wine, elaborated with the originating grains and fruits. I finished this lecture with "And that's why all of Andhra Pradesh is wrong" and looked up to see the entire bar staring at me. Thankfully this is just the general state of a bar in India, as nobody can understand me anyway... one of the fellow patrons later confirmed I was the first English person he had seen.

And that is how the english tourist got his reputation... and the least pleasant beer he had ever encountered
R. Kipling

India health problems

Things are getting bad down at the foot end. Serious sandal tan, parts of my feet look like they belong to different people